Hello, my name is_______

Hello my name is ___________, and I'm a Narcoleptic.  Doesn't it just seem like I should be standing up in front of some 12-step program somewhere?  Not that I am making fun of those but just saying/typing those words feels as though it comes with some kind of label, stereotype and you can just imagine what the person hearing/reading them is envisioning.  Now I have never seen Deuce Bigelow, I will have to admit, but I keep hearing people relate to it and someone falling asleep in their soup.  I imagine it was probably quite hilarious. Having said that, when my PCP(primary care physician) alluded to me being narcoleptic due to my complaining of being exhausted at work and falling asleep in my car on the drive home, I thought surely at least one if not both of us was crazy!  I had heard of it, but like I imagine they portray it in the fore-mentioned movie, I only knew of the cartoon-like symptoms that the media, TV and well cartoons had provided me.  I never thought for a second this could be me! I mean I had a hard time staying awake but I am a mother of 3 and had started that at such a young age and had done it by myself for so long.  I did try to pursue higher education as I come from a long line of ambitious over-achievers but I could never make the classes because between work and taking care of kids I was just too tired.  Something had to give and well the kids weren't going anywhere and we all had to eat, so classes just were not high priority.  Looking back teachers would always say, and I hated hearing this, maybe because I knew it to be true maybe because I was just as rebellious as the next kid, "You have so much potential, but you are just lazy."  I guess why that stings so much now is that I am 41 years old, my youngest is 16 and I still struggle EVERYDAY, what if someone, somewhere took the time to say, "You have so much potential, but you are just TIRED or EXHAUSTED?"  Where would I be today?  Would it matter?  Does that make me bitter?

I am newly diagnosed, I am starting this blog to organize my thoughts as I have previously only done this on paper, for about 2 months now since I first started on this journey and was told I needed to work on my sleep habits.  I kind of got in the habit of journaling and thought that this would be the best way to document MY journey.  I have read some of the others, sometimes I nap at work during my lunch break but sometimes it's too hot.  I hope to meet more people like me since there doesn't seem to be ANY where I am and sometimes I feel like I am going insane and no one understands!

Looking forward to meeting YOU!

Sleepy Siren